Rated G for Gibberish

..

2009-01-06T23:45:00.003Z

Shit, seriously, how lazy am I when there are still posts from 2007 on the front page? Fuck..

Hmm.

2009-01-06T23:42:00.000Z

So, another new year, eh?

I don't think anyone actually reads this at all anymore, so I'm probably just typing to myself? Ah well. Guess it needed something after so long.

.. shame there isn't actually anything here.

Here's to another year of being a totally lazy bastard with nothing to say!

How Can I Defeat Evil Without a Montage?

2008-05-13T22:28:00.002+01:00

Ello ello.

Hm. Funny how I update this less when I'm sat at home than I do while I'm spending time pissed up, huh?

As all.. uh, 4 of you who read this probably already know, I'm still pretty much off the air due to stupid dead computer-ness. Still waiting on moneys so I can fix it up and get back to the interwebs.

In the meantime, I've been playing a fuck ton of games, with the latest addiction of course being GTA IV. Good stuff. Speaking of which..

Why, yes, I am lazy..

2008-02-14T00:11:00.002Z

Yeah. Well.

Hmm. Don't really know what to do here now. The fact that I have been mostly ~~playing on my Xbox lots~~ moving and stuff, and not really had a working machine until this week have kept me off the air. Also, not doing much does that too. Feh. Guess I'll just start (?) spouting random nonsense here every now and then.

Ding!

2008-01-10T16:12:00.000Z

Well, so much for that idea, instead I shall get lazier.

Hm. Slowly going out of my mind in Jersey.. need to escape.. As my 360 is dead, the only things I have to keep me sane are my Wii (which I have no money to buy new games for, so not so much) and my return to WoW. Dammit. A year clean, and now I'm doomed again. Only 10 levels (and I've already done 2) to play this time though, so it can't be too destructive to me.. right? Right?

Oh hell.

New Year Get!

2007-12-31T12:30:00.000Z

Hnn. Well, I was intending to update at some point in the last week.. few things I meant to do, I had a proper holiday post with pictures (that's still to come.. it's on my hard drive, and I stupidly left the power supply in Australia), probably some random bullshit, and I'm thinking about a new name, since it isn't accurate anymore. But, instead, I've been drinking lots of beer (oh Carling, how I've missed you!) So, that naturally took priority.

Oh well, maybe that can be my New Year's resolution.. stop being a lazy bastard.

I doubt it.

Back to Civilisation.. Kinda.

2007-12-18T07:49:00.000Z

Well, back in Perth. Ho hum. It's refreshing to be back out of the sticks.. aside from passing through Brisbane and my overnight in Sydney, I've mostly been in places that are so small they don't even have traffic lights.. However, the crappy internet plan we are now on is over it's pisspoor monthly usage, so I am relegated to an internet cafe. The pain.

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 6 - Byron Bay to Sydney

2007-12-16T05:31:00.000Z

And so, time runs out. Pretty much bombed down the coast from Noosa, with only a couple of stops. Skipped Brisbane, leaving the majority of the people I've met on the way there, went Zorbing (which was pretty kickass) and spent a night in Byron Bay. Didn't get a chance to walk to the most Eastern point of Australia, but I did drink a shitload of beer. So that was ok. Left there the next day, also leaving behind the few other people I had met, and went to a place called Spot X, or Surf Camp, and went surfing for the first time. Unsuprisingly, I was awful. Managed to catch a few waves though. And also to hit myself in the face with the board. Ho hum. And then, another night on the goon.. feh. In to Sydney today, gonna do a quick on foot tour and get all the touristy photos (even though the weather is shitty) and back to Perth tomorrow morning..

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 5 - Noosa

2007-12-13T07:14:00.000Z

Next up, Noosa. Apparently one of the yuppie capitals of Australia, and here's me without a gun. For shame.

Pretty relaxed stop here. Met up again with Flip, who I met further up the coast, and basically just hung out for a couple of days. Went to Australia Zoo 'home of the Crocodile Hunter' yesterday, which was pretty neat. All the staff pretty much act like Steve Irwin, so lots of 'crikey!'s to be had. Today, just went to the beach to get a bit burnt, and then kayaking. And thats when it decided to rain. Lots. Ho hum. Tomorrow is off to Byron Bay, and then Sydney for Sunday, and that's my lot.

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 4 - Magnetic Island to Rainbow Beach

2007-12-08T22:41:00.001Z

Uh, so yeah. Not been on much. Spent the last week with scarce internet access and even less mobile coverage. Nasty stuff.

Anyway!

Next after Mission Beach was Magnetic Island, which is accessed through Townsville. I fucking hate Townsville. Magnetic Island was pretty cool, although sadly lacking in magnets. It does have koalas, but I got up too late to walk there and see some before getting the ferry back to land. Ah well. There's always Australia Zoo.

Then, we were off to Airlie Beach, gateway to the Whitsundays. Went out on a 3 day cruise on the Silent Night, and snorkelled and saw Whitehaven Beach and all that stuff. Ended up with the bloody Wind Waker ocean theme stuck in my head for 3 days. Dammit. Also, this was my first time in a while on the goon, and it did not end well.

Next up was a long trek to Kroombit, stopping at Lochenbar Cattle Station in the outback. Good beefs was had. Also, got to shoot a shotgun. Bonus!

Onward from there took me to Hervey Bay, for a 3 day offroad roam about Fraser Island, the world's largest sand island. (apparently) Once again, awesome Aussie naming conventions strike! Fraser Island is a world heritage park, and it's park name is the Great Sandy National Park. Near it is a smaller island covered in trees, which is called Big Woody Island. Le sigh. Anyway, that was pretty awesome, so lots of cool stuff, and drank far, far too much goon. Again. I also gained another Monkey title, this time of Roof Monkey, for climbing into the roof of the 4x4 every morning and evening to get all the camping gear in and out. Only a couple more and I might be challenging Rich for most Monkeys..

And finally, leaving Hervey Bay (which actually has nothing at all to do apart from go to Fraser Island) I am now at Rainbow Beach, where I stay until Monday, when I'm off to Noosa! Bit of a cockup when I got here, online booking for my room hadn't gone through, so I had nowhere to stay. Managed to get into a B&B, and the hostel has only charged me for one of the two nights I'm now staying, so that worked out ok.

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 3 - Mission Beach again

2007-11-27T09:36:00.001Z

Really, I'm only posting because I have internet credit.

Today, I climbed a mountain, and won a fight with a stag beetle. Go me!

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 2 - Mission Beach

2007-11-26T10:18:00.000Z

I'm probably going to be keeping these rather short because.. well, I'm a lazy fucker, that's why.

Anyway! Since my last oh so enthralling installment, I have swam about the Great Barrier Reef, played with a snake, fed a kangaroo and seen a crocodile damn near take a dude's leg off. I have also drank lots of beer and got burninated. Such is life.

Obligatory Travel Posting: Part 1 - Cairns

2007-11-24T11:00:00.000Z

Holy shit, it's hot. Cairns is in a tropical part of the country, so even now, at 9pm local, it's still pretty hot.

Spent my first day of my holiday just charpsing about and not doing much, but tomorrow I go diving at the Great Barrier Reef. Which should be nice.

Unfortunately I'm a dingus, so I forgot my camera USB lead. So I shall probably have to retcon all these posts later with pics.

So, in the meantime, you all must just pretend to be impressed with stuff, right?

Internet get! ..uhh.. kinda

2007-11-23T14:13:00.000Z

Waiting at Perth Domestic Airport for my flight.. man, these things suck. If they're gonna charge by the second, they could at least not be on a connection that sucks balls. Fuckers. Anyway! Here I go...

Something something.

2007-11-19T08:48:00.000Z

Well, really couldn't be bothered typing anything last week. Or this week, really. So, digest mode!

First, today marks the beginning of my internet deprivation, as the 20th is our reset date, and they're going back to a shitty metered plan that I would simply destroy.. again. And, of course, I'm off traveling Friday and will be living somewhat hermit like. I'll be stopping in at internet cafes for life support, I'm sure.

For all uh.. none of you? who care, mini capsule review of Gigantour!

As expected, Lacuna Coil were once again very good. Totally a band who are meant to be on a small, dark stage (I thought they were a bit lacking in broad daylight on the Download main stage last year) Sadly only on for half an hour, and I was a bit confused that they were first, since I assumed they were bigger than Devil Driver, but go figure.

Devil Driver themselves were.. well, Devil Driver. Standard issue circle pit, lots of screaming and metal.

Static X were better than I expected, mostly because I haven't heard anything much good out of them for years, but their set was good fun.

And finally, the headline act, Megadeth. Hmm. Now, I vaguely recall us catching some of their set at Download in 2005 and not being particularly impressed (although we may have been drunk by that point) and you know, I thought the same again this time. I mean, there's nothing *wrong* with them, it's just nothing about the performance really seemed special. Probably doesn't help that the only original member of the band is Dave Mustaine (making me think of Axel & Friends) And there goes what little metal cred I had..

I do have photos and videos, but they all came out a bit shit. Might try and operate on them when I have some Photoshop power at my disposal, but meh. Never mind. You win this time, camera phone!

Stupidly ended up being exposed to WoW over the weekend, after almost a year clean, and now the need to play is back. Dammit. Oh well, just as well I'm about to have a month sat in Jersey with very little to do.

And for now, that's me. Next post: Somewhere hot on the East coast.

And now for a brief interlude.

2007-11-12T11:36:00.000Z

I'll write something about Gigantour during the week, probably. Can't be arsed right now though. Suffice to say, it was awesome.

So, today, six weeks into my current job, the manager of my department comes over to me and tells me that the head of my area is leaving soon, and would I like to take over her job? Heh. So there you go. Potential permanent governments job in under 2 months!

And finally:

TLA: As my grandfather used to say, "I'm pregnant with the dog's baby." says:
I've been a fool...

Dan says:
without a tool.

TLA: As my grandfather used to say, "I'm pregnant with the dog's baby." says:
hey! I've got a tool, I've got so much tool that I AM a tool!

TLA: As my grandfather used to say, "I'm pregnant with the dog's baby." says:
no, wait

Your turn, fuckface!

Do not touch the operational end of the device.

2007-10-30T10:31:00.000Z

Hm. Kind of a go nowhere fortnight. Repetitive loop of work (dullness increases exponentially daily) and limited drinking, due to needing moneys for holiday.

Speaking of holiday, that's now all booked, so a mere 3 weeks more working before I spend a month over east, in the sun with no internets..

.. I'll probably die.

I'll probably be on intermittently with those travel updates that people always do whenever they're somewhere nice.

Travelling has been hell for the last fortnight, due to Transperth deciding it's a GREAT idea to put two platforms worth of services onto the same platform (in the admittedly fancy new underground station). Nice work Transperth! Give whoever did the math on that one a cookie! And then stab him in the eyes.

Gigantour is a week on Saturday, and is the closest I'll get to a festival. However, Megadeth + Static X + Lacuna Coil + Devil Driver + Beer = Win. Pics and video to come after the gig. Assuming I'm not too pissed to see.

I may well be.

Also, like probably almost everyone else on the planet played Portal and the other goodies of the Orange Box. But you've all talked about that already, so I'll just stick to the fact that it's totally awesome.

Tax Return Get!

2007-10-13T08:59:00.000+01:00

So, I finally got back all the ridiculous tax I've paid up to July, a total of a whopping two and a half thousand dollars. So that's my holiday over east sorted out at least.

So, of course, I celebrated this fact by drinking several gallons of alcohol, and then sleeping on a mate's sofa. I have pain today.

New job is going quite well. It's very relaxed. No monitoring of where and when you are, I can go for as much coffee as often as I want (which is frequently, I fear a coffee overdose relapse in my future) as long as we get everything done, it's all good. Government pay too, which is spiffy.

And this week..

2007-09-30T05:32:00.000+01:00

.. I started a new job, quit it the next day (it was shit), spent a couple of days as an unemployed bum, and then got a new job (with the government!)

On the more exciting side, I managed to buy both Bioshock and Halo. I won't bother saying anything about them, because any comments would be larely pointless, because we all know how good they are.

Week of dilemma..

2007-09-24T10:11:00.000+01:00

Hm.

So, my visa-dodging-agency-swap plan didn't work, so I'm on to a new job this week. We've since discovered that I can actually stay working for the same agency, so they've got me another job. Unfortunately, this one is only 25 hours, and is an extra 20 minutes travel on a second train which is on the line that is totally closed for a week in a fortnight.. so this is not good.

However! There seems to be plenty of stuff going in the city at the moment, as long as I'm basically willing to whore myself out to crappy jobs. Eh, it'll only be for about two months, so fuck it, should be right.

Also, my special edition Bioshock finally came in.. the day before Halo 3 comes out. And I can only really afford one. As Matt very logically points out (and I had come to the same conclusion myself) the Bioshock would be much harder to replace, but.. Halo..

Hm. Maybe I should go back to my bank robbing plans?

No one would have believed..

2007-09-09T13:47:00.000+01:00

Last night we went to the live performance of 'Jeff Wayne's Musical Version of War of the Worlds' (which I think is competing for longest official title ever), and it was most very awesome.

I've been a big fan of the original record ever since I was a kid, listening to it off the vinyl copy my dad had, and catching it again when it was re-released on CD back in.. 99, I guess? I was somewhat suprised when we got the DVD of last year's UK tour in at work, since I hadn't even known it had happened, but I thought it was over and done with. Anyway, they've brought it on tour again this year, and I got tickets for the show at the Burswood Dome.

Hm. The Burswood Dome. It's designed originally for tennis, and it shows. All the seats face center, which is a bit of a pain in the ass when you have a stage down one end instead. And the seats are nasty plastic things like school chairs. I'm taking a damn ass cushion next time I see something there..

Anyway! It was pretty sweet. All the music is, unsuprisingly, live, which means a 10 piece band and 40 piece orchestra, as well as singers. Off the original album, both Justin Hayward and Chris Tompson are still alive/not too old, so they're back in their old parts, with new singers for the rest of the cast. For the Australia/New Zealand leg of the tour, they've got local artists, which means we got 'Australian Idol' winner Shannon Noll as Parson Nathaniel instead of Russell Watson.. I'm not sure which is worse, but hey, at least he dies after two songs.

The bits that everyone, rightly, mentions though, are the 'Martian Fighting Machine', and 'Richard Burton's Head'

The Martian Fighting Machine is a 30-odd foot tall (3/4 scale, I believe) model of the Martian machines as they looked on the old record art. It comes down over the stage once they appear in the story and proceeds to try to kill the audience with heat rays. It, uh, doesn't do very much else, but it sure looked cool.

For those who don't know, Richard Burton did the spoken word lines in the original, but he's been a bit dead for 23 years. So instead they took his lines, and made a very realistic 3D model of his head, and make it speak his lines.

For the UK tour last year, they were projecting the head onto a sculpture of his face, but this year they did a hologram onto a clear screen, which worked a lot better, as it gave more range of movement and expression.

.. I should really have taken a couple of pictures or a video or something to spice this up a little. Hm. Oh well. So instead, here's a shamelessly ganked version of Forever Autumn during the Nottingham performance last year. Justin Heyward has had the same haircut for 30 years. This amuses me. Older, crappier Richard Burton head in attendance.

Anyway, it was most very awesome, and if any of you are even vaguely interested in the album, it's touring the UK again in December, and is well worth going to see.

Grr argh

2007-09-03T10:45:00.000+01:00

So the other day my Mum gets a letter from Bradford Uni (dated the 15th July.. gee, that's quick post!) saying I've missed the May hand in deadline for my master's dissertation, and I have until the 7th September to hand it in or I just get a Postgrad Diploma. Several points:

1) What the fuck?
2) Gee, that gives me tons of time.
3) WHAT THE FUCK?

See, I handed this in back in December (as anyone who talked to the quite severely caffeine OD'd and sleep deprived me will probably remember) Now, I know that students aren't known to hand things in early, but is that some kind of group unconscious thing where we know the fuckers will lose it if we do? Grr. So now I have to phone them and find out what the hell is going on, and if they can't find it, rip them a new asshole. There's a good chance I'm failing it anyway, but godammit, I'm failing for things that are MY fault, not theirs.

EDIT: Dammit. Talked to Andrea who is polite and helpful. Damn damn damn. There goes my angry plan.

Yippie-Ki-Yay!

2007-08-19T08:52:00.000+01:00

So yeah. We got Die Hard 4(.0, Live Free, whatever the fuck subtitle your country gives it) a good month or so later than the rest of the world, and finally got around to seeing it today.

Actually thought it was pretty fun, although clearly they had a concept and thought 'Hm.. not sure we can sell this. Let's stick John McClane in it and make it more awesome!', instead of being a Die Hard from the get go.

The main problem it has, I think, is a complete and total lack of charisma on the part of the villain. Hans Gruber? Awesome. Simon? Also awesome. Can't remember who Die Hard 2's villain was, but that was the crappy one of the three anyway. This guy? Meh. 'I'm the good guy!'? Please.

I can see why the interwebs have been ripping it to shreds too. Man, talk about technology rape. My favourite bits though? The kid's magic bag with every single plug and connector ever, and one other thing..

When the FBI guy is talking to Tuvok.. uh.. whatever the characters name was.. he says the badguy might be backing up all the financial data onto a portable hard drive. REALLY! Earlier in the film the screen in the trailer with all the hackers said it was 500 terabytes. Man, I have got to get me a 500TB portable hard drive.

EDIT: Oh yeah, and the little bit where an FBI Agent Johnson goes to drive them, and McClane's reaction amused me, but by the complete lack of reaction with the audience, I guess most of them didn't get it. Dicks.

It's alive!

2007-08-18T10:14:00.000+01:00

Yes, like a freshly reanimated zombie, my 360 has shuddered back to life.. It all seems to be working ok for now, although it sounds.. off, somehow. I don't expect it will stay this way, but maybe it'll last the 3 months more I need it to.. maybe..

Rather suprised it came back, since I've heard the Ring of Death basically means the console is bricked. Hm. Although it did do it that one time back in March, too, but it didn't give any problems booting back up then..

I suspect some evil necromancy is afoot.

RIP.

2007-08-16T13:32:00.000+01:00

And so, as I feared it was going to a few months ago, my Xbox has bit the dust. It had been randomly locking up for some time now, I noticed it particularly with the Halo 3 beta, but last week even Contra killed it. At least it's given me the Ring of Death, so I can get the under warranty repair.

The interesting question is, how in the hell am I going to do that? It's a UK system, and I'm not exactly close to home.. I'm too lazy to do it now, but I shall call them on the weekend to find out if I have to send it back to England, or if they can repair it here. After all, the system is identical apart from the DVD region, and the DVD drive is fine. And so to completely rip off Chris, I shall probably keep a track of it here..

Thank god I have the Wii with me..

Now I need to convince my WiFi to start working again.

Objection!

2007-08-07T09:57:00.000+01:00

Two posts in the same month? The world must be ending.

I'm becoming increasingly infuriated with international release delays. I've just finally got around to picking up Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (which is far more fun than a game about lawyers really has any right to be) and I've just about finished it (just on the final, DS chapter now) so I want to get Justice for All.. only, I can't seem to find it. I know I saw it in at least two shops earlier this year, yet when I've gone looking for it now, I find it isn't due for release over here until September. Eh? Now, if I'd only seen it in the local games shop, I'd just write that off as simply being import copies, but I'm certain I saw it in EB as well. Anyway, I shall continue hunting tomorrow, once I have been paid.

In any event, the part that has annoyed me is the delay. If it was just sold out? No drama. I remember that the original did. The game came out in Europe in March, and in America in January. Nintendo of Australia generally can't even be bothered repackaging the games for the territory, and just stick ratings stickers over the PEGI/ESRB ratings of American or Euro games. (I've bought 3 DS games over here: Castlevania, Hotel Dusk and Phoenix Wright. Castlevania is a Euro release, and Hotel Dusk is American - and these both came from EB) So what's the fucking hold up? European games at least have the somewhat flimsy excuse of needing to get stuff translated, but over here they only speak English. So that's out. I can't think of a single good reason for it, aside from Nintendo Australia being even more pathetically inept than Nintendo Europe, and that would really be saying something.

And of course, just to make matters worse, the third game comes out in America a mere month later.

And they wonder why everyone imports these days?

Apathy vs. Stupidity

2007-08-01T11:11:00.000+01:00

I think I'm working too much. I need a vacation or something. I'm sick of stupid people, and the constant torrential downpour is making me miserable and not care about anything. Or maybe that's just the stupid people.

Like, today. I had a guy phone up to say his phones aren't working. Now, my phone screen said he was on that line. A few questions later and I determine that he has a standard phone that works, and some cordless ones that don't.

Then he says his house has no power.

.. I almost hung up on the spot. Stupid bastard.

Something something..

2007-07-25T13:34:00.000+01:00

Eh. Just a post for post's sake really.

Winter drags on, and it's pissing it down most of the time lately, although I gather it's much the same in England anyway.

Early mornings are not my friend. If I wasn't leaving in a couple of months, I'd definately be job hunting again by now. I don't understand how the permenant people do it.

It's getting quiet there too. The drinking squad is winding down, with Sandy MIA with illness for the best part of a month, and Rob off to the East coast for a month.. hm. Well, I guess it'll be a cheap month for me.

Suppose I'd better get to reading Harry Potter soon, before the internets spoil the damn thing.

Uhm.. yeah.

2007-06-25T11:11:00.000+01:00

Well, again, a pretty quiet.. well, near on a month this time.

It's hit winter here now, so it's mostly rain, but the odd days it isn't, it tends to be nice and warm and sunny. Great! So I take a jumper and a coat in the morning, and it's a random draw as to whether or not I need them when I finish.

Today I did not.

Work is still.. well, work. We had the first Mass Service Disruption (or MSD, if you will) of the time I've been there. The storms through New South Wales which you may or may not have heard of caused thousands of homes to be without electric, phones, water, etc, etc, so we've had a pretty hectic couple of weeks, and it still isn't all fixed up.

It's reaching that time as well, where we've been there long enough that people start to leave. At the end of the week, Colm heads off back home, and Kara disappears to Europe, leaving just five of the original 13 who started. Still, at least most of the drinking club is intact, at least until the end of next month, when Rob leaves too.

Other than that, drinking as per usual, as well as some gaming, of course.

This month, it's been Gun, Kameo and Mortal Kombat Armageddon.

Gun is great. Short, pretty restricted, but great. If they made a movie of it with the game's voice cast, Tom Jane, Lance Henriksen, Brad Dourif and Ron Perlman, to name the best of them, it would be very awesome. Jane is pretty much being the Punisher again, which is OK, since the character is basically the Punisher in the Wild West. Good stuff.

Kameo somewhat suprised me. I'd always intended to pick it up at some point, mostly because it was Rare, and I generally enjoy their stuff, but.. I dunno, it never got cheap enough to warrant it, because it didn't look all that great. Well, it ended up taking an entire weekend away from me, and was a lot better than I expected. I could probably do with going back and trying to get the A rankings at some point, but that might be pushing it for now.

And of course, Mortal Kombat. I missed this one when it came out originally, and have now picked up the Wii version. I've since read it never got an Xbox release in Pal territories? I could have sworn I saw it at some point, but I guess I might be wrong. Wouldn't be the first time.

Anyway, that's destroyed my weekend this week, and I've even suprised myself by ending up playing it with the Wiimote instead of classic controller or Gamecube pad.

I guess I miss the old fatalities, but the make your own one at least lets you get one every time. The create a character thing is pretty nifty too. I just wish I'd known about the relics in Konquest mode before wasting so much money in the Krypt buying costumes instead of bits for the character mode. Ah well. And hey, Konquest is like another Shaolin Monks, which is a nice bonus. And hey, 64 characters! There were even some I didn't know, but they're all Mortal Kombat 4 characters who never got in another game, so to hell with them anyway.

Well, that's it. Essay done, if my current trend stays true, I'll be back in 2 months..

EDIT: Oh yeah, and it's just been on the news that Gordon Brown is now PM? Christ almighty. Still, at least it wasn't Prescott, I guess.

Back from the abyss..

2007-05-28T12:17:00.000+01:00

Just to say, what a load of

Nah, not really.

Pretty busy last couple of weeks, all work and no play make Daniel drink lots after work and be a tired boy. Not very much exciting on. Me and Rob have become awesome at Guitar Freaks at the Arcade of Awesomeness. Not so awesome at Virtua Cop, but that's besides the point. We pwn Bishi Bashi, too.

The War of the Worlds live show is coming to Burswood in September, and now that I'm actually working when it's on, I'll have moneys to go see this one. Hurrah. Should be awesome, it apparently has a 30 foot tall animatronic Martian robot in it.

Ehm. Think that's probably about it. No exciting new games or anything really. Tremble in fear of my action packed life..

Hmm..

2007-05-13T11:20:00.000+01:00

Anyone else been having lots of MSN problems since the 360 patch on Wednesday? I seem to be getting unable to deliver errors, either going out or coming in pretty much constantly.

My 360 decided to pick up on a six month old version of my tag (somehow) and it's all seemed a bit squiffy since. Something to do with linking it up to the Gamertag breaking it maybe?

Oh noes, a random encounter!

2007-05-06T12:35:00.000+01:00

Continuing my steady stream of posts that have no point whatsoever, another post that has no point whatsoever!

Brighouse's very own Mr Pizza can stand no chance against

He might not be a ninja, but he's close enough to make it awesome.

The mightiest street in all of Perth Metro will smite thee, verily!

There's a shop in the city that sells 'healthy, low fat pies'

Now, really, isn't that defeating the point?

I assume I'm not the only person who laughed my arse off when I heard Paris Hilton was off to jail?

Boom!

2007-05-03T12:31:00.000+01:00

Well, I finally have a day off on Saturday! Yay. I shall spend the day doing two things, sleeping, and then playing more Crackdown.

Firmly sticking to my trend of being several months behind on games, I finally picked it up last week, and as I'm sure everyone in the world knows by now, it's good fun. I've been taking my time eliminating the gangs, getting my skills and achievements and stuff, instead of blasting through them, which is the main problem people have with the game, it's damned short. Still, any game that you can leap off a 20 story building, machinegun a bunch of guys in the head as you drop and then survive the landing has to be good.

I picked Sonic and the Secret Rings up today, and while it seems good, I haven't spent enough time with it to make a full decision. I seem to be taking a while to fully get the controls down, but that might be partly me being resistant to change in how a Sonic game works, and partly that I haven't used the Wiimote in the slightest for 2 months.

I've also played through Hotel Dusk, which was damn fun. I'm liking how the point and click adventure genre seems to be having a bit of a rebirth at the moment, and the DS is a fantastic place for them. Maybe some Wii ones too at some point? Please? Anyway, Hotel Dusk was great, wonderfully drawn and characterised (plus Hyde is a total asshole, it's nice not to be a goody good all the time)

We've also found a couple of arcades around the city, which have begun to factor into some of the drinking runs. The last one we found last night has loads of awesome stuff. There's a Konami guitar game that Guitar Hero is blatantly pillaged from, with cheesetastic Japanese songs and a link up drums game (but our third player didn't want to play) tons of old fighting games (just about everything from the original SF II, up to Tekken 5, with a bunch of other Capcom and things like Guilty Gear in between), the obligatory Metal Slug (this time, 4), a range of Virtua Cop and Time Crises, and two that particularly stood out.

The first one was Mario Kart Arcade. What the hell? When did that come out? It looks like Gamecube era, but it's a completely different game, and it's made with Namco, so Pacman is in it. I demand a home version, bitches!

Lastly, the best of all. Bishi Fucking Bashi Special. Fucking hell yeah.

Blue wizard is about to die, needs day off badly.

2007-04-29T13:07:00.000+01:00

So, with my foolish inability to say no to overtime, I'm ending up working from the 22nd to at least Saturday the 5th (unless I get put down for that anyway) with only one day off, ANZAC day this Wednesday just gone (look it up yourself if you care to, too lazy for a link today)

Ugh. Kill me now.

Illusions shattered.

2007-04-19T14:57:00.000+01:00

So, this whole 'all Aussie blokes are called Bruce and all Aussie lasses are called Sheila' thing? Yeah, they've never heard of that over here.

Apparently Sheila is the slang for lasses, probably the equivalent of 'birds', but Bruces? Nope. Nothing. Hm.

Somewhat disappointed.

If I get drunk well, I'll pass out on the floor now baby

2007-04-15T13:32:00.000+01:00

Another week of being too lazy to post, blah.

So we started working shifts this week, and straight away we're being asked to do overtime. So each day this week, I've been in at least 3 hours early, which at least has somewhat made up for losing Monday to stupid bank holiday. Already I'm back into my old habits of never saying no to extra work. Ho hum.

This week's existence mandated drinkathon took us to the lovely climes of Northbridge. It's not popular with a lot of the locals, because apparently it's violent and stuff. Well, fuck that. Spend enough time in England and that isn't really a concern. The only problem with it really was that over here prices go up on Fridays. This angers me greatly. Still, a pretty good night, had a substantial amount of booze (leaving me with little money again) and went a few places I'd not been before. However, I've said it each time, but this time I really, REALLY mean it, but I'm never drinking Hoegarden again. How do people happily drink that shit? Ugh.

As we stayed late, I missed my last bus, so ended up kipping on Rob's sofa. This was a great plan. And then the train missed a stop/we were drunk and didn't notice one of them, and got off at what we thought was the right stop, but was actually the next one, and had to walk an hour and a half to get to his house. That was.. odd. Especially since neither of us actually knew the way there other than 'down'. So, both pretty pissed up, we begin roaming off through the poorly lit side streets, seeing a whopping two people along the whole way. But then, I guess it was stupid o'clock in the morning, so that might be why. This, with a whole six hours sleep on said sofa, led me to be completely fucked up yesterday.

Summer seems to officially be over this week, as it's starting to get a bit of a chill on, and it's been raining steadily for about 9 hours now. Joy!

Went back to Marvel Ultimate Alliance, in preparation for the new characters that were due out Tuesday, and the bug that lots of people have been complaining about from the last patch has finally hit me. Just when I thought I'd unlocked all the costumes, I notice I didn't get the achievement. After looking through, I see that Storm's last costume is gone, which I'd only unlocked an hour previous. So, I've saved and will now not play it again until they re-patch it. Fun.

Luckily, I've also had some arcade games to play. Finally picked up Uno and Ultimate Mortal Kombat 3, as well as Alien Hominid. Not a lot to say about Uno.. It's just.. you know, Uno. UMK3 is much more ballachingly* hard than I remembered, probably because I'd only played crappy Pal-50 console ports before. While I can't help but wish it was MK Trilogy (I miss Raiden and Johnny Cage) it's still pretty good. I coulda swore Rain was in this one, but the unlockable ninja are just old Sub Zero and Ermac. Hm. Motaro is a cheap motherfucker. Alien Hominid is awesome. And hard. Very very hard. Glad I never got around to picking this up when it was released originally, because I know I would have ended up getting it on the arcade anyway, and I already have enough games duplicated.

*You may not think this is a word, but it is now!

Boredy boredy bored bored.

2007-04-06T08:17:00.000+01:00

I hate bank holidays. Always have, as far back as I remember. They weren't so bad when I was at Smiths, since I would just work every single one of them at time and a half, which I didn't mind at all. We had one back in January, but that didn't mean a whole lot to me then, since I was doing fuck all every day anyway. But now that I'm back at work, and I've got a routine on, it just feels like a complete waste of time.

There has to be something to do around here on public holidays.. hopefully we'll manage to get something arranged with the guys at work, and do something. Anything. Please. For the love of god.

It wouldn't be so bad, I guess, if there was a pub near here. I know on the couple of bank holidays I had off last year, they saved what little of my sanity I have left.

I'm so bored, in fact, that I've spent about the last hour going through the 'Oddly Enough' archives at Reuters. I found them by way of Google Australia, which has randomly added a bunch of news links and stuff to the main page. Normal news isn't all the interesting, and generally far too depressing, but when you have news reports about things like fat people being sent to the vet for checkups in Rio, dentists who piss in their surgery sink, a woman falling out of the sixth floor and being saved by landing in a pile of shit, and so on, what's not to like?

Employment 3: The Perpetually Delayed

2007-04-01T14:36:00.000+01:00

No, it really wasn't worth the wait, but what the hell.

So, my new job is working in the support center at the basically the Aussie equivalent of BT, answering calls of people who have service problems. I either sort out their problem from their end (you'd be suprised how often a phone service gets broken by a dead phone being plugged into it), or testing the line and sending out a technician. Pretty simple stuff. You get the odd difficult one, but that was true of retail too, so what the hell. I do get a computer at this job though, which is a bonus.

We have the beginnings of a drinking team on the go, with 7 of us who regularly turn up. Half price cocktail night at the local rock place FTW.

In theory, I get paid pretty well.

I say in theory, as because I'm not a resident, I get taxed about 1/3rd of my wage. Which, naturally, is a fucking ballache, and means after tax, I'm on less an hour than I was at Smiths. Bah. Oh well, apparently I can get some/all of it back come end of the tax year in June, so we shall see.. But in the meantime, I guess no more games for me.. thank god I still have more to play..

Arcadey fun.

2007-03-22T11:59:00.000Z

Like Matt, I've been spending a fair bit of time on Live Arcade this last couple of weeks, both playing the new releases, as well as catching a few of the older ones. Especially Castlevania.

Man, I miss Castlevania. I wish I'd been able to bring more of them with me, and I haven't managed to pick up Portrait of Ruin yet. I still can't fathom why Konami didn't release Dracula X though, since the vast majority of Castlevania players have never played it, and most of those who have have only done so emulated (with gitches, naturally) Apparently it's going to be on the PSP 'enhanced' Symphony, but dammit, I want a shiny fullscreen version. They could even have come up with a new lame Castlevania name for it. Opera of Nonsense, or some shit.

Other things I hope hit either Live Arcade or Virtual Console some day:

Chu Chu Fucking Rocket!
~~Super Castlevania IV~~
Perfect Dark
Any good beat-em-ups. Streets of Rage 2 and Golden Axe would be awesometastic.
More good fighters. Guilty Gear?
Micro Machines. Probably '96.
Mario Kart 64 (but ONLY if it has network play. It's pointless otherwise)
Segasonic Arcade (what! Stop looking at me like that. I know I can't be the only person in the who would actually want to try the damn thing 3 player)
Revenge of Shinobi

And where the hell is Zelda 3? Damn you Nintendo Europe/Australia. Stop fucking us over compared to everyone else. I WANT TO GIVE YOU MY MONEY. LET ME!

EDIT.. I've just read that some VC games in Europe are being released as emulated 50hz versions. Which means the CV 4 will be the shitty Western version with blue lakes of blood and all this crap. I want my blood and other gore, dammit! Bah. Thinking about it, a Jap version of Castlevania: Bloodlines would be nice, too.

What the fuck is up with that? I thought we'd moved past those dark, bordered and slowed down days. Assholes. So that rules out the entire Mega Drive catalogue, judging by the list, and if it keeps up probably the entire service as far as I'm concerned, unless all I want is TG 16 games.. Ooh, R-Type!

Oh, except I can't get any of the TG 16 library in Australia. Damn you, Nintendo!

Irritants, and some sporting (!) goodness.

2007-03-21T08:37:00.000Z

Public transport and I have a kind of love/hate relationship. I don't mind it usually, and when it turns up, it's all good. But what I DO hate is people. Doesn't matter what part of the world you live in, some smelly git will sit next to you on a crowded bus, and then will proceed to not go the fuck away when the bus clears up. Bastards. Get your own fucking seat.

I'm still holding off on a proper 'my new job' post, probably until the end of the week. Though I did discover today that the system has an code labelled FFS, which sadly doesn't stand for what it should.

I digress. There's a table tennis table in one of the breakrooms in the building, which no one seems to use. Yesterday, Rob and Colm started playing on breaks.. by today, we now have six of us playing, with Colm thinking of starting a league or something. Suprisingly, while I am crap, I'm not as shockingly bad as I expected.. The table is a bit dodgy, which Colm nicely demonstrated mid game by making it collapse, but I think I can sort the joints out to make it stronger. Hurrah!

Travelling tips for gamers

2007-03-20T11:46:00.000Z

I have a post planned for my new job, but I'm just too damned lazy to write it now.

But, just to pass on an experience for the day, for anyone similarly geekly enough to travel to another country with their 360.

You know those points cards they do for buying stuff off the Marketplace? Yeah, don't ever buy them anywhere other than the country your account was created in. It's just asking for trouble.

.. especially if you don't read the back of the packaging, open it and scratch the code before realising this.

Luckily, a new Silver account later, I managed to use my points and waste them on same games I didn't really need (since I bought them for Castlevania), but if the console ever dies, I won't be able to play the games with my usual account anymore. (Yay DRM..)

Coming ~~Friday~~ whenever I can be arsed:

Employment 3: Some vaguely amusing subtitle.

Employment 2, the Wrath of Job

2007-03-13T07:47:00.000Z

Yep, after a mere 8 hours of it, I am no longer in telesales. Yay! I start my new, not pestering people, job on Monday, with weekly pay and full time hours for great justice.

Employment is..

2007-03-12T13:03:00.000Z

.. shit.

So I started my new job today. Sadly. I was really hoping not to get this one, because from the job description, I knew I would hate it from the start:

The job (and to be fair to them, they're actually nice enough, so I won't name and shame) involves cold calling businesses, and generating leads (industry lingo for names of people we can ring back and pester) and then doing said calling back a couple of weeks later, to try to persuade them to buy our product, which is a discount scheme for hotels and restaurants and stuff. To be honest, if I was one of those travelling businessmen types, I would probably get one myself. But, I digress.

Anyway, as you can imagine, a lot of people don't like getting randomly called like that, and some get abusive, some just hang up etc. (One of the girls who also started today was called, after merely saying hello, a 'fat, ugly cunt' by the guy on the phone. Charming.)

I also went in 'smart office wear'. Which means, shirt and tie. I've worn a tie like 3 times since I left GCSE's (which is why I can remember how many times, they've all been reasonably notable, for one reason or another)

So, here's me, not looking very impressed at all at being half killed by restrictive neckwear in the blazing heat of Perth.

A lighter side to the day though, I get home, and after having a fight with the modem for an hour or two (we blew a fuse this morning, it fubar'd the modem and I ended up having to get the password reset to fix us at the exchange) I had an email from the guy at the other job I'd applied for (which, ironically, is at the very building I had to ring to sort my connection out) saying he'd been trying to contact me. So tomorrow, I may very well have another job, with more hours, more per hour, and me just answering phones instead of dialling.. We shall see..

EDIT:
And yes, just in case Gary decides to comment, I WAS supposed to be there today.

Reflections on a simpler time..

2007-03-04T07:29:00.000Z

It being Sunday and all, I've had a lazy day. Well, I have a lazy day most days, but shut up.

I ended up playing the first two Mega Drive Sonic games all afternoon. Now, it's no secret that Sonic 2 is probably my favourite game ever, and maybe I'm just on an off day, but things kept bugging me. Such as:

Sonic 1: Something has always bugged me about the Starlight Zone, but I could never put my finger on it.. It occurred to me today. According to the manual and stuff, Sonic can run at the speed of sound, right? So now come these pathetic little desk fan like things can stop him from moving forward?

Sonic 2: Tails is a fucking retard. He has no redeeming features, at least not in this game. I started playing, and didn't realise I'd forgotten to turn him off like I used to until I got into a special stage, where he seemed to get as many rings as possible, and then Zerg himself into the bombs. Stupid slow responding AI.

I also played some Red Steel this morning. At the current rate I'm playing it, I should have it done.. oh, by Christmas. It's pretty fun though, once you get used to it. Coolest/weirdest thing? Yakuza members wearing what look to be blue suede shoes..

What the..

2007-03-03T13:59:00.000Z

Just in case anyone managed to miss it, I saw this over at Kotaku yesterday.

I'm perfectly fine with Jesus being a vampire hunter, but start ripping off awesome things from my childhood? That's just.. wrong. Fuckers.

Best show ever..

2007-02-26T17:59:00.000Z

I will go to bed at some point. Probably.

However, before I do, and while I seem to have my typing frenzy on, I just had to touch on Heroes. As Gary said a couple of weeks ago, this is a truly phenomenal show, each week getting better and better.. And this week.. Well. It was fucking awesome. And they hope to run for five years? Jesus. If they can keep outdoing themselves each week, it will go from being best show to literally the best thing ever in existence in the entireity of human history.

Seriously, if you aren't watching this show.. do you even like TV shows?

Best movie ever?

2007-02-26T16:38:00.000Z

Sounding possibly even better than the awesomely terrible Wild Zero (find it, download it, and read about the drinking game before you start..) is.. this.. this.. absolutely bizarre sounding fucking lunacy. I mean, just what the fuck?

I must see it.

"If I'm not back in five minutes... call the Pope."

Battle Pope, maybe? We can but hope.

And then..

2007-02-26T16:25:00.000Z

Can't shut me up today.

Yes, I know it's a different day here, but I haven't gone to bed yet, so what the hell.

Just been talking to Leon, and reminded of something that amused me today.

I ended up in EB in Joondalup, where I overheard that guy at the counter telling some customers that, while the PS3 is due on the 20somethingth of March, they still have preorders going, and that Sony have guaranteed that they will fill every order the company places.

This, naturally, had me laughing.

Now, while I am aware that there are units sat on the shelves in America, surely no one in their right mind can think that Sony can NOT fuck up a console launch and supply every unit in a territory? They already failed miserably in the other two main territories (I'm counting Australia as Europe, since apart from location it basically is) so, really, why the hell are they expecting them not to do the same here? The mind boggles.

And coupled with this bullshit, does anyone even care about the damn thing anymore? Are Sony seriously trying to destroy themselves?

I'm not even supposed to be here today..

2007-02-26T13:17:00.000Z

So, now that my beer has run out again, (dammit) I was kinda thinking today..

.. I think I miss retail.

Now, hear me out before you write me off as insane.

I went for this quasi interview thing at this petrol station/quick stop place (yes, I know)

I say quasi, because they had an employee who had bailed on them for the third time running, leaving them in the shit again. So my sort of interview thing was just a chat behind the counter. Now, as trivial as it may seem, this was the first time I've been behind a store counter since I left Smiths in December.. and.. I dunno. It felt sort of like being back home?

I won't deny it's shit work. Customers, generally speaking, are assholes. But.. hell, I had fun. Okay, Birstall was a misstep, since that largely sucked, and I should have stayed in Bradford. Mocking the customers, messing about, the nights out after. Oh the nights out. A pub next to work? Genius. It was like living Clerks, but with alcohol.

I think it somehow ties into how I percieve the job. To me, since I've been doing it since before I finished my A-Levels, retail isn't a 'real job,' so to me doing it isn't actual work, and actual responsibility. If I was to get an office job or something (which, over here doesn't look like a possibility anyhow) I would be getting past that, getting said 'real job' and.. I dunno. Growing up? Seems a bit depressing to me. I'm not ready to grow up yet. Where's Peter Pan when you need him?

Increasingly, I have this feeling I might end up in retail when I get back to England, and this doesn't scare me anymore.. If not for the shitty pay.. Hm..

And hey, it let me have a reason to quote Clerks every few weeks, can't argue with that.

Yay!

2007-02-26T07:04:00.000Z

I found a fiver on my credit card today, so I bought beer! I am now happy.

Or at least, will be for a few hours.

I can't think of a title for this post.

2007-02-22T13:41:00.000Z

So I won't bother.

Ho hum.

Another week, and still struggling for work. Trying to get even just a till monkey job or something somewhere, anywhere, just to be getting money in, but no luck so far. At this rate, it looks like my options are limited to:

a) Moving somewhere that has seasonal work, at least for a while.
b) Go work on a fruit picking farm for a few weeks.
c) Give up, fuck it off and go home.

Now, none of these options particularly appeal to me, especially the last two. I have been thinking though, I was planning to go to Sydney for a week, but if I was to make it a month or so, I could get some casual work out there (since, it's more touristy, and they have more things like that available) and maybe pack about for a bit. I dunno. We'll see. I'll have to decide depending on my success with this weekend's paper..

Went for a roam around Perth this week, and it was a nice sunny day, so I got some (hopefully) nice pictures of the city from across the river, and a couple of others. They'll be going up in the photo album ~~when I can be bothered doing it~~ some time soon. Happy now Susan? Touristy photos! I'll probably be down Mindarie at some point again soon too, and that photos pretty well.

In the meantime, another mini games re-review of another 360 launch title.

Burnout had started to anger me (one challenge and one signature takedown to go, but the damn things just will not go) and Quake on General is.. well, it's fucking hard. So, this week, I've been playing Condemned: Criminal Origins.

Hm. Well, it's a fun game but.. damn, it's short. It's quite nicely fucked up though, with one of the levels making me think of Silent Hill quite a bit. The combat system isn't bad either, as once you get used to it, it's quite easy to block attacks from enemies, while giving them a battering between their swings. And if you hit someone in the face, instead of just your standard video game blood spray, you get teeth too! Fun.

I completely forgot the game had a tazer, as I continued playing from where I'd got to last year, and then played the next 4 levels without it. And getting killed quite a bit. So, I've now played all the way through it (can't have taken more than about 7 hours) through to the rather unsatisfying ending. Damn. Well, they sure better make a sequel to explain what the fuck happened.

It's a bit buggy too, but since it's a launch title, I shouldn't be suprised. It uses some kind of hidden statistics system to track what weapons you've used, what items you've picked up, etc, and these are linked to achievements.. only.. it doesn't quite work. I've picked up all the rotting birds in the game (which make a wonderful crunching sound when you grab them) which should have given me the Gold Bird Award. But it hasn't. Hm.

As I was playing it, I kept thinking that the player character sounded kinda familiar.. turns out he's played by Greg Grunberg (Matt from Heroes) which was pretty cool. Of course at the time the game was made, he was on Alias instead of Heroes, but I never watched that, so meh.

Anyway, a fun game, but in retrospect, I kinda wish I hadn't bought it for a stupid amount of money way back when, and just rented it for a couple of days instead. Oh well.

Why couldn't I type this much without thinking when I was doing essays? Bah.

When it rains, it pours

2007-02-15T13:32:00.000Z

Literally. They don't do light showers over here. It's either sun, or a torrential downpour. So, today, I was walking home and..

Bah.

Then, when I got in, I was presented with a most horrifying of sights..

The Red Ring of Death.

I'd left the 360 on getting a couple of arcade games (Paperboy, yay!) but I was only out for a couple of hours, so I thought it would be fine. Hm.

As far as I can tell, the version of it I was getting was just the 'overheating' one, which while a concern (especially since it wasn't doing anything) isn't too bad. I just hope this isn't the start of something worse, especially while I'm 10,000 miles from the nearest place that will service it..

Hm.

2007-02-14T15:10:00.000Z

Well, so much for that tradition. A bottle of wine down, and I can still focus enough to see what I'm typing. Bah.

If you're ever contemplating working in Australia..

2007-02-14T08:12:00.000Z

.. for the love of god, don't do it on a working holiday visa. Pay the extra, get a proper working visa, even if you only intend to stay a year. Bah.

EDIT:

Yeah, ok, got sidetracked with the drinking. Right.

A working holiday visa in Australia lets you work with any employer for up to six months. This is, unsuprisingly, less than desirable to some companies (despite the fact that the average employee may leave in that time anyway, they don't like knowing that you WILL) and so many, many, many, many places will be unwilling to hire you on that basis. Which is a fucking pain in the ass.

However, as I have checked since, a proper working visa requires you to have basically a trade or defined profession. So I can't change onto one of them. This leaves me where? Up shit creek without a paddle, and with a big fucking hole in the canoe.

The fastest hunk of LEGO in the galaxy..

2007-02-12T08:24:00.000Z

This is the most awesome thing ever made. I want one!

More Games..

2007-02-11T13:49:00.000Z

So, it's been a pretty quiet weekend. Spent yesterday morning roaming Joondalup (yup, another one) looking for work, but to no avail. Play with the jobs section in the paper tomorrow..

So, I've had a fair bit of time to play some more games.. My TBC still not having arrived (a trip to the depot, or whatever they have this week, I think) has left me spending a lot of time on the 360.. So, played a bit more Gears.. about half way through co-op again (I'm Dom this time though. Yay achievements!) and finished off the single player. Can't seem to get RAAM dead on hardcore though. The bastard. So I gave him a kicking on casual to see what happens. Back to him tomorrow..

But the game that's really hooked me this weekend is Quake 4. I know, I'm about 2 years late for it, but it's actually pretty good. When it first came out, I just couldn't be bothered with it, after the complete fuckup that was Doom 3. Luckily, Raven have still remembered how to actually make a game, and not just an engine (id, take note) and it's actually fun. OK, so it's nothing spectacular or groundbreaking, but it's a nice solid FPS with fun weapons of glorious destruction. And hey, I'd forgotten how good a rail gun was.

It did, however piss me off. After finishing the first act yesterday, I checked what achievements it had given me. I was playing the game on the Corporal difficulty, because easy mode is lame. However, unlike just about every single other game on the system, it doesn't give you the achievement for the easier difficulty than the one you're on, so to get them all, you have to play the entire game 4 times. Ugh.

.. That's what we get for being achievement whores, I guess.

And hey, it comes with Quake 2! With Live support! Bonus.

EDIT: Not so bonus. Quake 2 only has system link and splitscreen. Lame.

Oh, yeah..

2007-02-09T09:53:00.000Z

So I went in for this job the other day. Had an interview with the boss, who was perfectly pleasant, vaguely described the job to me, about selling things to people and stuff. Now from this, I assumed it to be like one of those stalls you get in shopping malls, like Sky and stuff do? Like some of the ones in the Kingsgate Center. Fair enough, I thought. Megaboring-shit, but what the hell, it's money.

But oh, was I wrong. Turns out they're more the sort of door to door salesman type. Except they go door to door around shops and businesses in retail parks and the like, trying to persuade people to buy cheap QVC style pap. But that's not it, when people say to go away, they just go back half an hour later when that person is gone!

Horrid, utterly soulless evil work. So after an hour or so of this (I was on a morning 'observing' to see if it was the sort of thing I'd want to do) I know that I had absolutely no interest in it whatsoever, since I still kinda like what's left of my soul, and got out of there pretty sharpish. So, the hunt continues..

Live Get!

2007-02-09T01:45:00.000Z

So I've been just playing games single player lately, and it was starting to get a bit tired (I guess a year of WoW will do that, need someone to talk to) so Leon hooked me up with a 3 month Live gold card, so we can play some shit. After having to wrangle with some muppet in probably India about getting my subscription cancelled so I could activate the card, (Remember when I lost my wallet? The subscription had tried to go onto the old credit card, and wouldn't let me cancel it manually. Piece of crap) and her being a complete moron, and not finding my account (She found Matt's instead. You haven't changed your address yet either!) we were ready to go, and played some Gears. Had a little lag, since I've fucked my connection for the month, but it was good fun to be playing something social again.

I noticed most of you guys haven't been on for a few weeks (Naming names, worst offender is Eddie, but he's moved house, so I MIGHT let him off. Maybe... Well, Rich was worse, but he hasn't been on in a year, so meh.), is no one playing anymore? I've a hankering for Gears, GRAW, Burnout, PDZ and Marvel Ultimate, if anyone wants to join us over the next few weeks.

EDIT:
Oh yeah, and I think my Gamertag might be going slightly schizo. The Xbox website and my account details still pick me up as an English account (all the subscriptions plans are listed in £ not AU$), yet mygamercard picks me up as Australian, and all my Live Arcade games now mysteriously have Aussie rating descriptors instead of the old PEGI ones that were there before. I wonder if it'll sort itself all back out when I get back?

Randomness

2007-02-04T15:58:00.000Z

First of all, I spotted this box in a shopping center last week..

Now, I'm no expert, but surely that's not a very humane way to sell them?

Secondly, I found this ad in an issue of Infinity Gauntlet earlier.. Lovely piece of crappy nostalgia. I love how it not only fails to correctly describe the game (since not only does Sonic not have any gadgets, he arguably doesn't get any tricks until the spin dash in the next game), it also makes him sound like a complete jerk. Stupid speedy critters.

Speaking of critters, I didn't realise on a conscious level until the other day that there are possums over here. Camera on standby if I spot one.. And if you don't know why that would interest me, don't worry about it, move along..

Just for Chris...

2007-02-04T02:33:00.000Z

Barbie with big ass shrimp on it. Happy now?

What's in a name?

2007-01-31T13:51:00.000Z

I may have touched on this here before, or it might have been in an email or msn.. frankly, I'm far too lazy to check..

I'm absolutely amused and bewildered by some of the names things have over here. Sure, you've got all the normal sounding ones everyone knows. Perth, Sidney, Melbourne, Adelaide. Fine, fine. But then you've got positively fucking bizarre ones. Like Dalyellup , Walla Walla, Gnangara or Porongurup (which amuses me for immature reasons that should be readily apparent)

.. I probably could have come up with some more interesting links, but hey, they prove the places are real, so whatever.

These names just amuse me for the silliness. I'm reliably informed that most these names are either taken from Aboriginal words, or are actually the original names for them. So that's fair enough. The ones that really get me are the completely fucking lazy names of some of the places. Like this one.. now, I can't think of the stretch of logic required the day they named this place.. maybe they were pissed? Townsville. I mean, what the fuck? Is it a town or a village? You can't call a place Townvillage and expect people to take you seriously.

Edit 3/2: Today's discoveries.. Kalgoorlie and my new favourite, Jerrabomberra.

Ho hum.

2007-01-31T07:13:00.000Z

Spent another day wandering the streets of Perth. Today was a job hunt. Just after Christmas is never the best time to try and find work, and over here is no exception. Hm. Still, there was a computer shop hiring 'experienced customer service people' and if 6 and a half years isn't experienced, I don't know what the fuck is. So we shall see if they get back to me..

Australia in video: Part 1

2007-01-27T10:52:00.000Z

Random videos of things I've seen over here so far!
~~Since I needed to outdo Eddie with videos of stuff more interesting than snow~~ Since Eddie's been playing with videos this week, I thought I'd put up the few I've taken over here so far. Obviously, they're just phone videos, and they'll pretty much want muting, since ~~I'm too lazy to find a way to edit them~~ I haven't found anything I can strip the audio off and edit them with yet. If I do, I guess I'll update these with better versions. But anyway!

Seals!

Stingray, stingray!

And, uh, extreme coastal lightning!

I have a better one, but not thinking about this, I had the phone sideways, so it comes out wanky on youtube. Meh.

There was also a comet the other week, but that didn't come out at all. Ah well.

Gyarrghh.

2007-01-27T05:36:00.000Z

So, I randomly started playing Burnout Revenge again the other day.. It's the only game in the series I never got round to finishing, since the 360 came out while I was still playing it on the original Xbox, and then when I finally picked up the 360 version.. I think WoW happened, not sure..

Anyway, I'm playing through perfecting each of the rankings before moving on to the next one.. (mm, gamerscore!) I forgot how truly fucking irritating the burning lap events with the special cars are. I've just spent the best part of 45 minutes doing the 2 minute White Mountain race with the Criterion Racer. Make the slightest mistake.. Grrr.. And worst of all, this is a new house, so I can't even hurl my pad at the wall in anger. Anyone else still playing this? When I get my Live hooked back up, I want to have a go at the multiplayer again.

EDIT: Just read, there's an as yet unnamed fifth Burnout game due out in May or so.. ooh!

25 points to elite rank!

Fall down go boom

2007-01-26T12:58:00.000Z

Ugh. Just had the genius idea to walk home from Mindarie, so I've spent the best part of 2 hours walking in 28ish degree coastal winds. Not my best idea ever. Now I need beer and collapse..

Coming tomorrow.. 'Australia Nature Review part 1' in video form. Bet you can't wait.

Toasty!

2007-01-26T07:15:00.000Z

Ughh. It hit 40 degrees this afternoon. Why am I in the oven again?

Crazy dutch bastards..

2007-01-24T05:43:00.000Z

So, I've just got back home after spending 20 minutes roaming Perth since I missed my train (dammit) and I passed a group of goths in the standard big leather coats, boots thick black etc etc. Now, I'm all for people being able to wear whatever the fuck they want, but I was just in a shirt and normal trousers, and it was too hot. Crazy fools.

Rated R for Retarded

2007-01-23T08:01:00.000Z

Well, not so much actually.

This is more just a sort of random thought that occurred to me the other day while I was browsing the games and DVDs in K-Mart. Everything over here has the same ratings system (Which you can read about here, if you're that way inclined.) so all games, DVDs, movies at the cinema, whatever, all have the same symbols on, and they're all law. Now, I've probably talked to just about everyone likely to read this about how this is the most sensible possible system to stop people harping on about kids playing harmful games, and hey, somewhere in the world has actually fucking done it! Plus, for stupid people, unlike the BBFC 12 and 15 ratings, everything is a different colour, so you can tell what rating it is by just glancing at it.

The only downside is, the M rating (which is kind of our 12, but not) is just a recommendation, and not a legal one, (kind of like 12A at cinemas, I guess) but still. I guess retailers would do like we do in England with PEGI and refuse it anyway. Pay attention, America, you fuck tards. Stop whining about how restricting games sales to minors would 'breach their constitutional rights' or some such nonsense and do something about it.

Bright light city..

2007-01-18T13:54:00.000Z

So I went back to Perth again today, and had more of a roam around.

My initial impression of it being a sunny Leeds was a bit wrong. The whole city spreads out from Hay street, which is kinda it's high street, but several hundred shops and businesses long. I didn't realise just how long the street was the first time, it takes more than 20 minutes to walk the length of it. It's not as 'big' as you would expect the main city of half a country to be, with only a couple of really, really big buildings.

Looks pretty nifty when it's all lit up at night, too. No orange glow!

But all in all, not a bad city to go shopping in. It's kinda weird seeing places you recognise, like Borders and the now-defunct in the UK Electronics Boutique, surrounded by American (yes, I know the two above are as well) chains like Target, as well as crazy Aussie places.

Speaking of crazy, the people walk around barefoot here a lot. Everywhere. You kinda expect it around where people live, (especially since everything is flat paving and no gravel) but people walk around the city like that too. Not something I'd be trying in Leeds, that's for damn sure..

Fuck yeah.

2007-01-12T13:34:00.000Z

To elaborate on that, I spent this evening at the Burswood entertainment complex (or whatever) They have a huge casino and an Irish pub (hence, the shitty Guinness) as well as a couple of theatres and stuff.

As we were leaving, we walked past the entrance to the theatre, where they had one of those big ass tickers saying what was on. We're just about to go, when the Ginger One notices something, which he calls out. I stop, turn, and wait for the ticker to come back around. Turns out he was right. Weird Al is playing there in March. Oh yes. Now.. where am I gonna find some money..

Gyah

2007-01-12T13:33:00.001Z

Australian brewed Guinness is fucking nasty.

That is all.

I'm sorry, I must have been mumbling..

2007-01-11T10:22:00.000Z

Ho hum. Few days of quiet. A bit of sun, but not been gallavanting about too much. Went to Perth, which was interesting. Gonna go back next week without the Ginger One, and see it properly though, so I'll talk about it then.

What else have I done since I got here? Hmm.. I haven't just been drinking. (may be lies)

Seen a couple of films at the cinema..

.. you know how on adverts and trailers for films, they say 'only in cinemas'? Over here they say 'only at the movies'. Crazy people..

Saw Night at the Museum, the new Ben Stiller film. That was pretty good. Not as funny as the trailers made it look, but good regardless. Robin Williams as Teddy Roosevelt? Genius. Bonus points for Dick Van Dyke, too.

We also went to Blood Diamond. Now, I hadn't heard much (read: anything) about this before we went in, and I was somewhat less than enthralled on learning Leonardo DiCaprio was the lead. Well, turns out I had nothing to worry about, and it's a fantastic film. Nothing particularly groundbreaking story wise, but very well acted and directed throughout. (yup, even DiCaprio, shockingly) Definately one I recommend if you have a couple of hours to kill and feel like watching something new.

Unsuprisingly, I've also been playing a few games.

Finished Zelda Twilight Princess (if you haven't finished it yet, why not - I'm looking at you, Liz!) Superb. As many have said, possibly the best Zelda ever? I then restarted Wind Waker, and kept trying to aim the grappling hook with my pad. Stupid non motion controls..

Now that that's done, my Wii is sitting lonely and unused. I really should play Red Steel, but I keep not getting round to it. Meh.

Picked up Marvel Ultimate Alliance on the 360. Good fun. Was kinda disappointed/confused at how it's a mishmash of regular/ultimate universe stuff (come on, where's my Samuel L. Jackson style Nick Fury? He's an unlockable skin, but that's besides the point.) Pretty nifty though. Was hoping on a better showing of the X-characters, but I suppose Cyclops is just adding this to his list of media he gets fucked in (that, and they had the two legends games, I guess.) And why the hell isn't every character who has a model in the game playable? Mortal Kombat Deception pissed me off with that, too. Nice to see Moon Knight and Deadpool in a game though.

I've also finally got around to playing through Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga off the GBA, after playing it for about an hour, oh 3 years ago, and then getting distracted by something shiny. Oooh, shiny!

.. ahem. Anyway, if there's anyone with something that can play it who hasn't yet, it's absolutely brilliant, not to mention rather absurdly funny.

Now, I just need to get this computer upgraded. WoW is calling..

Maybe I'll catch fire, Something warm to hold me..

2007-01-08T00:34:00.000Z

Ok, so the sun is back. With a vengeance. There was some crazy cyclone thing up on the North coast that was making it a bit overcast and windy down here, but that's cleared up now. Not that I minded too much, since I've just come from the Windiest Place On Earth (tm). Funny to see everyone who lives here thinking it was really cold though. Heh.

It was about 37 degrees when we got here last Thursday, and it's meant to be back up to that by tomorrow. Fun.

Anyway, now that the sun's back, I thought I'd take a picture of the house, so you can see how big things are over here.

I know I had it coming, I know I can't be free..

2007-01-07T01:58:00.000Z

Right, right. Updates.

A couple of days ago, we went to Fremantle Prison. It's hard to believe going around it that it was still open only 15 years ago.. They should make modern prisons like that, that would cut down on crime.

In some places, they've restored some cells to how they used to be in the 1800's. These things are basically a stone box, about a meter square. Nasty. A lot of the old things are still there, including the gallows (which according to the tour guide, is still set up since after the last execution there in the 60's, but that's probably BS) The noose there is hung off a big solid beam that used to be used for public executions in Perth, and it has dozens of notches along the top where multiple people would be hanged at the same time. Lovely.

A most interesting tour though. Tried to leave The Ginger One there, but they wouldn't take him. Bastards.

So have you a quarter, I'm begging you please..

2007-01-03T07:58:00.000Z

Yesterday, we went to Swan Valley.

Now, wine has never been my main tipple of choice, but man. This place is insane. They do coach tours of the wineries (yeah, not sure what happened to vineyards) where you visit something like a dozen of them. We only went to a handful, but that was enough. A lot of them do free tastings, and some charge a couple of dollars. One place that I don't recall the name of (it was the last one, so it's not my fault) charges $2.50 (that's about a quid) to try 11 different wines. Owch.

So you can imagine, going on one of these tours, stopping at all the places, spend like 5 quid and get completely smashed on a wide variety of wines. I ended up with a very nice bottle of Merlot from the Lancaster winery that I intend to demolish one day soon. 8 quid for a fancy bottle of wine. Sorted.

Not that there's just wine, either. There are a few cheese places, and a very nice chocolate factory too. What a wonderful place.

Beer

2006-12-31T07:05:00.000Z

So I'm slowly exploring the beer here.

I've latched on to something called Carlton Cold, which according to the bottle, is a bitter. But that's bollocks, because it's clearly a lager.

I've had to do this because they have no Carling over here, and the Carlsberg tastes even more naff that it does in England. No Carling? WTF? Crazy country.

Pubs. Pubs are pretty much non existant here. The nearest one to us in about 10 minutes drive away (though it IS a nice pub). I guess this is because they spend most of their time drinking in the garden with BBQs. But still, it's rather shocking and a little painful.

Also, they don't really do beer in cans. Everything comes in these short fat bottles that they rather originally call 'stubbies.' One plus to these though, is they're usually screw tops. Yay for not needing a bottle opener!

Next door are hosting the New Year's party tonight, so I intend to sample some other local beers.. eexcellent.

Ph34r.

2006-12-30T11:42:00.001Z

Ph34r our BBQ. Ph34r it!

Hong Kong

2006-12-30T01:45:00.000Z

So, I'm here and set up. But before I properly move on to Australia, I first had to stop in Hong Kong airport. It's a.. strange place. They have noodle bars where you get free internet access if you buy noodles, and random shops full of tacky crap, right next door to a tie rack or burberry, or whatever. It's also pretty big, but all on one floor, so you have massive long stretches of airport, with about 30 gates along it, and these people mover floor things that I can never remember the name of. But I digress.

They also have this big food court type thing upstairs, with all kinds of food. Unsuprisingly. Quite a few of the signs for places amused me, mostly because of references too stuff. If you don't know the references, you probably won't be amused. But what do I care? This is my blog.

I want my chicken.. Bitch!

Ohhh shit.. it's..

Time!

I also had a nice one of Burger King written in Chinese, but all the signs are too fucking bright, so it was just an overexposed mess. Ah well.

Speaking of Burger King.. There are NO Burger Kings in Australia. None. There's a similar place called Hungry Jack's (which, as I first thought after seeing their logo and font, are what's left of the Australian Burger Kings, thank you Wikipedia), but they're just not the same. And they don't do XL Bacon's. Who'd have thought they were exclusive to Europe? Bastards. What am I gonna do? I'm screwed.

G'Day,

2006-12-29T01:30:00.000Z

Welcome to my random crappy blog thing.

I shall mostly be using this for putting up pictures of stuff. And babbling.

Actually, mostly babbling.